today,

I sat in my bed this morning with tears rolling down my face, I questioned my reason for waking up. I questioned why I should go to school and sit through a class. then it came to me, we dont need a new reason everyday to get up, because God is our reason. friends or family shouldnt be my reason, I should wake up and want to go out and live my life for him. So as I realized this I was overwhelmed with a smile and a sense of comfort, I didnt feel like I had no hope. Realizing this gave me a new perspective on the day. Instead of looking at everything poorly, I handeled my day with patience and grace, and this strength helped me come to the realizization that I missed my best friend, I missed her and I couldnt deny it. and to another person, I always thought you had an overwhelming amount of knowledge, i thought you were so incredible, and I still admire you, but I have learned not to depend on you to fix me, I have to do this with those I love, maybe you were there for me at my weakest, and now its time to do it alone, and Im at peace with it. Im going to be fine without you, I know I will. anyways, birthday soon, so excited for party, see all my close friends! I love this<3